There’s a scene in the Avengers when Captain America says to Dr Banner, “Now might be a good time for you to get angry.” Captain America thought Dr Banner needed to get angry so he could turn into the Incredible Hulk. Dr Banner turned to him and said, “That’s my secret Captain – I’m always angry.” And with that, he turned into the Incredible Hulk
Matthew Henry says, “Though anger may come into the bosom of a wise man, it rests only in the bosom of fools.” The Bible says a lot about anger. And so does Proverbs.
There are over 30 verses in Proverbs specifically addressing anger. Today we are going to make 14:29 our homebase. It has two halves. Let’s organize the sermon into two halves. First is the wisdom of patience. Second will be the foolishness of a quick temper.
#1: THE WISDOM OF PATIENCE
Notice the first half of the verse again: “Whoever is patient has great understanding…” Understanding is synonymous with wisdom, it means you understand what is right in God’s eyes and you do it. Wisdom and patience go together.
We see this again in Proverbs 19:11a ,which says, “A person’s wisdom yields patience…” The word “yields” mean to make long, or stretch out. It can refer to time, as in someone took a long time to come. It can refer to lengthening something, as in stretching out tentcords (Isaiah 52). It refers to sticking out your tongue, as God rebukes the Israelites for when he says, “Who are you mocking? At whom do you sneer at and stick out your tongue?” Who do you lengthen your tongue at? Lengthen. Lengthen your patience, or stretch out your patience. Wisdom makes you stretch out your patience.
And this is very like God, who says in Isaiah 48:9, “For my own name’s sake I delay my wrath; for the sake of my praise I hold it back from you, so as not to destroy you completely.” “I delay my wrath…” I lengthen the time before I let loose my wrath. This is the same patience described by Peter when he says, “God is patient, not wanting anyone to perish, but wanting all to come to repentance.” God extends his patience because He does not want people to perish, but to repent. So He lengthens the time before He lets loose his anger and judgment.
We see that our own patience therefore is grounded in our knowledge of God’s patience. Remember James 1 says, “Take note: everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and SLOW TO BECOME ANGRY.” Our problem is we wait too long to listen, and we don’t make our anger wait long enough.
APPLICATION: Slow down your anger. Be like God and stretch out your patience.
Those who are wise show it in their patience. Some ways we see that specifically are seen throughout Proverbs.
First, wisdom means we show self-restraint. Proverbs 29:11 says, “The fool gives full vent to his rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.” “Bring calm in the end.” In other translations its translated as “a wise person holds it back” (NASB20). Or, “the wise person holds it in check” (CSB). The NIV says, a wise man brings calm in the end…and it refers to the man bringing calm to his own spirit, his own passions and charged emotions. The contrast in the verse is striking, one man goes full throttle, letting loose his full rage. The other man is one who keeps those powerful emotions in check. One man is out of control, the other is in control.
Another way wise patience is seen is in the face of provocation. Proverbs 19:11 says, “A person’s wisdom yields patience, it is to one’s glory to overlook an insult.” One of the fastest ways anger can flare up in us is when we feel disrespected. Touch my ego and you’re gonna touch off my anger.
But the best example of this patience in the face of provocation is our Lord Jesus Christ. Isaiah 53 prophecies 700 years before Jesus about how he would go through his court trial, “as a sheep before its shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth.” The Gospels tell us that he refused to answer any questions or defend himself when all the false witnesses lined up and gave false testimony about him. First Peter 2:23 said after Jesus, “When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.” Jesus showed perfectly the wisdom of patience in the face of provocation. He did not as Proverbs 14:3 says, “lash out with pride.”
A third way we see wisdom in patience is when we apply patience in persuading others. Turn to Proverbs 25:15 with me, “Through patience a ruler can be persuaded, and a gentle tongue can break a bone.” We can get angry when someone doesn’t agree with us. When there are differences of opinions we can rush into thinking that force is the best persuader. But here we read that patience more often is more persuasive than angry force. In Milton’s Paradise Lost Satan described his patient method to deceive the new humans with those famous words, “He who overcomes by force has won but half his foe.” In other words, he was going to cleverly, patiently, win the heart of his enemies, not force them to follow. You know his success.
A fourth way we see patience is by not being quarrelsome. Turn to Proverbs 16:32, “Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city.” Quarrelsome people feel the need to “conquer” others. They live as “warriors,” marching from one battle to another. This is not patience, thus it is not wisdom. Proverbs 15:18 says, “A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel.” Proverbs 20:3 says, “It is to one’s honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel.” Proverbs 26:21 says, “As charcoal to embers and as wood to fire, so is a quarrelsome person for kindling strife.”
Wisdom is seen in avoiding strife – not stirring it up. Calming quarrels is what the wise person does – not throwing gas on fires. Patient people wisely diffuse charged situations, like 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath.” They soothe angry situations with gentle words, and they’re wise for it.
With a little twist here, a fifth way that wise people show patience is that they help others be patient. Proverbs 21:14 says, “A gift given in secret soothes anger, and a bribe concealed in the cloak pacifies great wrath.” Wise people are patient, and they help others be patient. Proverbs 29:8 says, “Mockers stir up a city, but the wise turn away anger.” They turn away anger in others. They help others be patient when they were starting to get angry.
#2: THE FOOLISHNESS OF A QUICK-TEMPER
Then we turn to the negative half of our verse, “one who is quick-tempered displays folly.” The things done in anger are folly. Benjamin Franklin said, “Anything begun in anger will end in shame.” Marcus Aurelius said, “How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.”
These quotes, and verse 29 are warning us: quick tempers are going to make us act foolishly, destructively, regretfully. Look at verse 17, “A quick-tempered person does foolish things.” Fast anger is the fastest way to do foolish things. “An angry person stirs up conflict,” Proverbs 29:22 says, “and a hot-tempered person commits many sins.” Here are some of the foolish things Proverbs warns us our anger easily leads to
First, anger leads to a vengeful spirit. Proverbs 20:22 says, “Do not say, ‘I’ll pay you back for this wrong!’ Wait for the LORD, and he will avenge you.” We see this repeated also in 24:29 and 25:21, and the point is the same each time: anger can make us want to take “justice” into our own hands and bring our version of justice right now to someone who hurt us. Our anger makes it near impossible to wait on God to avenge our injury. Anger leads to a vengeful spirit.
Second, anger leads to being touchy. Proverbs 12:16 says, “Fools show their annoyance at once…” The word for annoyance is anger, vexation, spite, or wrath. The person who constantly and instantly shows their anger is being foolish.
Third, anger leads to self-righteousness. Proverbs 14:16 says, “A fool is hotheaded and yet feels secure.” Feeling secure means “confident,” and “feels safe,” and “trusting,” and “careless.” Its the idea that the hotheaded fool feels righteous in all their hotheaded foolery. They don’t realize it is a false security they feel regarding their anger. They feel their right, so they feel all their anger is justified, and they don’t do anything wrong in their anger. They feel safe that they’re morally right, confident that they haven’t done anything wrong – its all the other person.
Nothing – I’m telling you nothing – produces self-righteousness in us more powerfully than intense anger that we don’t examine.
Fourth, our anger makes us foolishly adopt other people’s anger. Proverbs 26:17 says, “Like one who grabs a stray dog by the ears is someone who rushes into a quarrel not their own.” The quickest way to make a stray dog bite you is to grab it by the ears. The quickest way to get bit by a person is to insert yourself into their quarrel. But, in my experience and the experience I’ve observed in others, I’ve learned a lesson: the more anger I carry around the more I’m looking for ways to vent it. Some of the best places to vent it is to get caught up in other people’s drama where I can vicariously let my anger loose, getting angry over their quarrel, even though I wouldn’t if I didn’t already carry around all my own anger. Like Dr Banner, we’re always angry, and we’re always looking for reasons to turn into the Hulk.
Fifth, our anger leads to foolish and sinful talk. Gossip (26:20); harsh words (15:1); unrestrained venting (29:11); blaming God (19:3); prideful lashing out (14:3); refusal to drop the issue (17:14; 18:19)
Turn with me to the NT, to Ephesians 4. Quick tempers, hot-headedness, sinful anger, are all things that “grieve the Holy Spirit.” Notice verse 31, “………….” Paul said something similar in Colossians 3:8, “But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.”
Paul lists 6 different forms of anger; six fleshly fruits of anger.
First he says, bitterness. Bitterness is a long-term resentment. We might say that we are nursing a grudge. It is when we have an attitude where we are unwilling to be reconciled.
Second, he says rage. Rage is translated also as wrath, and it means the flaring up of the temper. It is like a flame that comes from straw where it quickly flares up but then also quickly subsides. It’s when someone boils over or explodes or blows their top.
Thirdly he says anger. Anger is a word that describes the inner resentment we feel. It seethes and smolders. It is the feelings beneath the surface and therefore is more subtle, but more deep flowing. He’s grumpy.
Fourthly he says brawling. Brawling refers to the verbal fighting that can happen – shouting, yelling, outbursts of anger.
Fifthly he says slander. Slander comes from the Greek word blasphemia. The idea of blasphemia is that the words spoken hurt the reputation of another. It means to destroy or discredit another’s good name by speaking evil against them. We want to make them look bad in the eyes of other people. Romans 12:10 says “honor one another above yourselves.” In other words, spend more time honoring others with your words than you do honoring yourself. “Let another praise you and not your own lips.” When the word is used to describe what man does to God it is called blasphemy. To blaspheme God under the law of Moses was very serious and resulted in stoning. When the word is used to describe what man does to man it is called slander. Slander is serious sin. It grieves the Spirit. It has no place in the life of Christians.
Lastly he says get rid of malice. Malice means to be mean spirited or to have a vicious attitude. It’s when someone wishes to see others hurt. When the doctor says cancer is benign he means it isn’t harmful. But when he says it is malignant, the cancer is harmful and destructive. We are not to be malignant Christians, and therefore we are to rid ourselves of malice.
Ephesians 4: 31 itemized different species of anger
CONCLUSION: THE ANGER OF GOD
Let me finish by turning us from our own anger, and instead to the anger of God. His anger is holy, perfect, and just. And here’s the most humbling part: His anger is towards us. People may not like the word but the Bible still asserts it: sin. Our sin has aroused the holy anger of God.
But the good news is that our God, who is righteous in His anger, just in his wrath against sin, also loves us. While He is angry at our sin, in His love He provided a way for us to escape His anger and be reconciled to Him: Jesus. His Son. Jesus came and took the fullness of God’s wrath on Himself. He came to be our substitute, taking our place of punishment. All the anger of God that was “right” and “just” because of our sins was poured out instead on His Son, Jesus. Jesus became the propitiation for sin, meaning He became the one who turned away the wrath of God, turning it away from us and taking it on Himself.
Now, through Christ we have peace with God. We are reconciled to Him. Christ has removed our guilt and God’s anger and now we can be united with God, no longer alienated. If you are looking for God look to Jesus Christ. If you feel far from God confess your sins, which separate you from Him. Ask Him to forgive you because of Jesus Christ, and He will in that very moment take your sins away from you as far from you as the east is from the west.