Our sermon is titled Pure, part 2. We’re facing the topic of sexual purity because the Scriptures have so much to say about it and because the immorality of another leader in evangelicalism has made it a front and center issue. I have 14 points to help us live sexually pure lives. We saw the first 6 last week: 1) Avoidance, 2) You CAN say No, 3) take the escape, 4) prayer, 5) confession, and 6) meditate. Lets get into 7 through 14.
- Fast. Fasting is practicing self-denial. It’s an exercise in telling yourself “No” when your physical appetite is raging. Our culture is one of practiced self indulgence. We eat what we want when we want. We consume information. We are surrounded by advertisements appealing to our egos where we are told “we deserve it.” Pay attention to how much marketing revolves around that notion of giving yourself permission because you deserve it. The sexual culture is a powerful message to express all your sexuality, refuse yourself nothing, and don’t ever deny anything you want or feel.
But, Jesus said, “Whoever would follow me must deny himself, take up his cross and follow me” Jesus said. Paul warned the Philippians not to follow those whose “god is their stomach.” Practice fasting. Early Christians practiced fasting twice a week – and not for health reasons, but spiritual. Combine fasting with your praying and watch your self control and spiritual strength increase. Learning to say “No” to your hunger for food will make you better at saying no to your hunger for sexual immorality. The Christian life is lived on this one fundamental principle: denying the numerous passions and appetites and desires that daily arise within our own hearts. That is fundamental and non-negotiable. The corrupt culture, the spirit of the age, false teachers, false Christians will all urge total indulgence of your sexual impulses. But any true follower of Christ will not follow such notions just like they will not live for their appetites. - Humility. All sin is rooted in pride. And pride is powerfully at work in sexual sin. That is why understanding the different types of pride in our own hearts is so important to better resist temptation. Repenting of pride and adopting humility is critical for purity.
Sexual sin is prideful because sexual sin is very selfish. In our selfish pride we place ourself first, we place our personal gratification as the number one priority – no matter what damage it does or what/who it violates. Turn to Ephesians 4:19….. Notice the connection between sexual impurity and greed. Sexual greed. Its selfish too because we justify and rationalize our sin so easily. We’re right – or at least we’re not wrong … or so we tell ourselves.
Sexual sin is also prideful because it is strongly characterized by entitlement – a sense of “I have a right to do this.” This usually comes about by harboring toxic sinful attitudes like resentment, bitterness, anger, discontentment, and so on. When someone gives a home to these attitudes they develop a form of self-pity. And as soon as we start feeling sorry for ourselves and making that our permanent mindset we will start to act out. Self-pity makes us say, “Things are so bad for me I have a right to do this. I never get anything good, so I’m entitled to this.” So they look at porn, they start flirting with someone not their wife or husband, and so on. The attitude of entitlement is pride and it sets you up for sin.
Sexual sin is also prideful in this way: deception. Deceivers are prideful. When you engage in sexual sin, it typically is hidden, and you learn to deceive, you get good at living a double life. And the practice of deception makes you more prideful. Why? Because to maintain the deception you have to keep deceiving, to run cover for your sin you have to keep “pretending” you are an honest and good Christian. Pretending is pride.
Repent of pride. Prayerfully search your heart that God would help you recognize if any of these faces of pride are within you. And repent of them because they set you up for sexual sin. Humble yourself. Confess your sinful selfishness, self-pity, bitterness, discontentment and deception. Adopt a mindset that says, “I don’t have any right to sin.” Think of yourself as a servant of righteousness who obeys Christ, not a slave to sin obeying your lusts (Romans 6). Be committed to truth in a way that your outward life reflects rather than covers up your inward life. - Submission. The famous Proverbs 3:5-7 says, “In all your ways SUBMIT to Him.”You are not your own. God is over you. He owns you. First Corinthians 6 says, “You are not your own, you were bought at a price. Flee sexual immorality. Honor God with your body.”
Turn with me to 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8. Notice it says “It is GOD’s WILL.” He is our God, He is our Lord, He is our Master, He is our Commander. What He wills we do. Notice though also it says in verse 8, “Anyone who rejects this instruction does not reject a human teaching but God…” Purity requires we submit to God.
Listen to how Romans 6:12 describes submission, “Do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires” Do not submit yourself to the tempting desires within you. Submit to God. Surrender your self-willed attitude that keeps you from submitting to God. Surrender it to God and begin right now to submit to Him as your God and your Lord. Purity requires submission to God.
- God’s Judgment. God will judge sin. “Judgment begins with the house of God” 1 Peter 4 says. We are told that we will all stand before the judgment seat of Christ (Romans 14, 1 Corinthians 3 and 2 Corinthians 5). First Thessalonians 4:6 tells us, “God will punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before.”
The idea of God’s judgment should bring fear, and that fear has a purifying effect. God said in Isaiah 66:5, “Hear the word of the LORD, you who tremble at his word.” Those who tremble are those who obey Him. They fear Him. “Fear God and keep His commands” Ecclesiastes 12 says. 2 Corinthians 5 says, “But we know what it is to fear the Lord.” Christianity doesn’t erase the fear of God, it corrects it, and informs it. There is to be a very real place in the consciousness of Christians for fearing God. We are not serving a man. We are not bowing before a mortal. We are not worshiping a creature. God is a terrible God, terrible in holiness. iIt is said of Him that no man can look upon Him and live. The fear inducing majesty of God must be returned to our Christian minds.
Let me offer a perspective on how this produces purity. First it produces purity in the sense of we are afraid of what God would do to us for sinning willfully against Him.
But secondly, and I think this is very important – the fear of God a child of God has draws us towards Him. The fear of unbelievers drives them away from Him. His holiness terrifies them. His holiness is terrifying, but, also magnificent and a powerful fear of God causes a great awe and reverence for God and we become overcome by the severe grandness of God that we want to live for Him. That He is so transcendent, so awe-inspiring, so beyond language, so beyond human comprehension, that the and the In the bible there are two aspects to the fear of God. One is fear from not knowing him and the uncertainty of one’s standing with him because one is aware that God is Judge. The other aspect of fearing God is obedience. People who walk in obedience to God are said to “fear God.” Unbelievers have a fear of God’s judgment but they don’t obey God. Christianity removes the fear of judgment through the cross of Jesus Christ and shows how to obey God. “We know what it is to fear God” 2 Corinthians 5 says, right after informing us that we will stand before Christ for judgment. First Thessalonians 4:6 says…
- Keep Christ’s coming in view. Titus 2:11-13….Over and over everything in the Christian life is taught with one overarching truth in view: the coming of Jesus Christ for us. This cognizance we take on purifies us – Looking forward to that, looking up for that, takes our focus off of the moment we are in, the temptation of the moment. A great counter thought to tempting thoughts is to keep Christ’s coming in view and to stoke our desire for His return. Theres no room in our minds for impure thoughts when our minds are occupied with the return of our Lord
- Discipleship. Too many Christians have spent their whole Christian lives merely attending church, maybe having gone to Christian schools, and maybe Bible study classes. Don’t misunderstand me: faithfully attending Church is part of discipleship, and so are bible classes and schools that teach the Scriptures and godly living. But few, very few ever actually get into one on one relationships that are devoted to deep study, deep prayer, and opening up your life to another Christian. Paul discipled Timothy and Titus and others. Apollos was discipled by Priscilla and Aquilla. Moses discipled Joshua. Peter discipled John Mark. I was discipled by the former pastor of this church and it imprinted in me the value of one on one. One of the greatest joys I have pastorally right now is not only being involved in one on one right now with several guys, but seeing the number of one on one discipleships going on. There are currently at least 7 pairs of guys doing discipleships right now. I don’t know how to tell you how valuable it is, and how much more it facilitates growth than any other activity.
- Make Much of Your Marriage. Make much of the intimacy in your marriage. Turn to Proverbs 5:15-19. Far from being merely procreative, God designed marital intimacy to be for delight – physical, emotional and spiritual.
Turn to 1 Corinthians 7 with me. Here we see the duty in marriage to be a sexual delight to our spouse. [read] Do not deprive each other. Submit your body to your spouse and serve each other. Her body is yours and your body is hers.
The point here is: Make much of your marriage – make much of your relationship with your spouse and make much of your physical relationship with your spouse. That requires building your relationship as a whole because often the physical relationship is a reflection of the whole relationship. What is the emotional connection like? What is the communication like? Do you work out conflicts or do you ignore them and let them add up and compound? Do you pray? Praying together is powerful for the relationship, the trust, the bond, the oneness AND the intimacy! Pray together.
Make much of your marriage. Do we make much of our career at the expense of our marriage? Do we make much of our kids but not our marriage? Do we make much of recreational activities but not our marriage? We’re sinning. Make much of your marriage. Doing so promotes your own purity.
APPLICATION: Go home tonight and do these three things: 1) pray together, 2) read through Song of Songs out loud together, and 3)___________….you fill in the blank. Make much of your marriage and it will lead to greater purity.
- Be thankful. Gratitude enables purity. Ingratitude sets you up for sexual sin.
CONCLUSION
These are 14 helps for us to be sexually pure. Let us come to Communion now. Let us take some time quietly to reflect before the Lord, and to confess any sin, before coming to the table.